It is not always me :)

Just wanted to say that this weekend i wanted to have ......
But situation did not provide opportunity.
Last night pishi fell asleep when i got back from washroom at my parents. And tonight, pishi had a severe headache.
I am watching oscar and pishim just went to sleep.

Karma!!

Karma!!!
I don't know if i should thank your kindness or hate your cruelty.
I guess i could manage better without your kindness!!! So get the hell away !!!!

Today while i was lying on bed in silence !!!!

Yoday we went to an indian buffet with pishi and then we went to humane society and distillary district. We just got home

I dont know why i was feeling so upset this morning.
I realized today that pishi and I were always used to going out everywhere together alone.
This week my objective is to make sure that we get diet and go to gym and enjoy life :)

It is sunday morning 11:06 AM.
Pishi went to swimming. He said he will be back in 10-20 mins. It is half an hr and i am still waiting for him.
Haven't got out of bed yet. Don't feel like to.
My parents have guests. She invited us but pishi did not feel comfortable so we did not go. Their guests are gonna bring violin and drum and my mom made so much food like buffet.
Anyway we didn't go so i can lie on bed here so pishi would go and make me wait!!!

My Objectives for Future

Hi,
I guess my perfect life is getting started. which is taking care of pishi and myself and my future and the beuatiful home that we have made.
I need to work on few things for the next coming months:
1- my health: diet and gym schefule
2- my personal hobbies and achievements
3- taking care pishi and s... , home, food, etc
4- my own personal ideaology
5- careful research and analysis and follow up with my future plans for my job
I will give all these 3-4 months before I get involved in my future. and I guess if  I internalize all these habits then I have gained 90% happiness in my life :)
so excited. :D

Thank you God

I was just done with my Sociology of education final exam

It feels as if many very heavy weights has been lifted from my shoulders.

Thank God !!!

One more exam to go...
Even though pishi don't look at it as an exam, since I am not familiar with the topics, it requires times and effort still.

I will celebrate my graduation next week.. yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey

God knows how happy I am next week at the same time... :D:D:D:D:D:D

you know what? for the past 10 years, this is the first time that I feel fulfilled personally. the last time was when I got addmission to U of T. It has been hard past 10 years and I don't know how 20-30 passed.
BUT,
I have a long life ahead and I will make up for everything. yeeeeeeeeeeeeey

sick and lonely

It is 9:15 PM
I am very sick. I am very alone. no one is here to take care of me.
pishi went to second cup at king to study.
I am very sick and like most of the time in this life, no one is here to take care of me.
 I don't want to interrupt his concentration and I wanted him to go and study.
but I really need someone to give me soup and medicine and comfort. That's what I have always done for everybody.

I am writing this to remember these days and to remind pishi how I understanding I was so he won't tell me that I am not agreeable.
well, life has given me no option.
I threw up a lot now. I cried because I was scared that i would faint because I felt that I couldn't keep my balance . I sat in the washroom for 5 mins before I could get up from the toilet sink.

I wish someone was here to comfort me. I am very sick and I am very alone whenever I am sick.
I guess my rage and anger sometimes is because of all these things that draw on my unconscious.
I encouraged him to go and study because he doesn't have enough time to study during days. I prayed for him a lot and I hope one day he gets what he deserves. and I hope one day we become a normal united family.
anyways, I love our life and I hope one day it gets better.