Canada Day Long Weekend. Not the best¡¡¡¡

I wish only at least one day you'd realize how comitted I was to this relationship if everything goes wrong and we followed separate pathways.
I waited, waited and waited for so many hrs to just only spend a normal hr with you on a weekend to feel that I am alive and I have a husband.
It's Canada day long weekend, 9pm and I am almost begging for a normal life.

A lot of words unsaid....
So many whispers, so many nights, so many loving intimate body contacts and eternal unity has been missed...

Only If I was 35 yrs old when I met you, would I ever choose this life?

Canada Day at My Parents.

Cheers!!!

Caution! It's Messy lol...

This is what I find when I get home on a Friday night from work lol.

A heart breaking weekend.

It's Sunday night and I am setting my alarm for work at 5AM. It's been a very hard rocky road in my relationship with my partner. Not sure where this emotional turmoil will take me but surely there is an  a happily ever after or an end to any rd.

Fingers crossed. Tired and haven't rested much. But work is work.

Good night Toronto....

Wierdest Spring

Just got back from Brunch at The Federal. I have two final exams on Monday and Tuesday. And I will officially graduate from BHS program.

I'm too lazy to start studying now fir Kelly's. But it's not optional lol. And pishi just retrieved my password for this blog😁

Laziest Beloved Summer of 2017

The laziest summer of my life is passed behind me. Though I got bored of absolutely doing nothing since I woke up, it was quite an exciting experience. Watching 5-6 movies everyday with no friends interupting was really an exciting journey. I will miss you summer 2017 for the rest of my life until retirement.

I may have gotten tired and complained about lack of good friends, i now truly appreciate it since it was an unrepeatable experince. Thru this summer I think I truly got a chance to practice "the art of stillness" & mindfulness. Because of that, I now know what I want in my life and what my future plans are.

I hope the next time I experince this is with pishi when we are both happily retired.

Thank you pishi for allowing me to be this free till age of 34. Thank you for spoiling me and wanting me to always enjoy my life deep heartedly. Thank you universe for giving me this opportunity. I will forever be thankful and will cherish it everytime I remember summer 2017

4AM & sleeping alone on this bed

It's 4:20 AM. have been awake since 1:57 AM.
I wish there was someone who would hold me tight, baghalam mikard. Someone who couldn't bare to sleep without me until he would hug me tight. I feel so alone.

While he is sleeping on the sofa tooye hal, I have been trying to sleep, crying, and hugging mamoosh.

Anyway! Thought I'd keep this on record